How nerdy are you? Because there is some science behind why you and your husband experience euphoria during orgasm differently, and why, specifically, he notices his most in a BJ.
Okay, so if I’m getting the vibes right: you both are experiencing a euphoria in orgasm sometimes. But one part in particular struck me was how Joe described orgasm in a bj versus in penetration, whereas you’re not limited to a certain kind. I’m wondering if different parts of your brain are lighting up to make you both orgasm and it’s actually giving you slightly different responses. So during sex, notably in periorgasm, men have more activity in parts of the brain associated with information coordination, pain suppression, visual input, timing, and prediction of physical consequences of an action. Whereas women have activation in systems which deal with knowing where our limbs are in space, sensory processing, touch interpretation, and movement. Now these changes in peri-orgasm pretty much lead to an identical ending, orgasm, and that releases almost identical chemicals and shows up pretty much the same way. But, what that shows us is that there is more than one way for the human brain to end up in that happy place of orgasm, and that it might be different slightly for the sexes or at least for different people. It doesn’t dictate quality of an orgasm, but it does show that it’s not just “oh I like missionary and you like doggystyle” differences in how people might get to orgasm, but literally our brains might be going different ways to end up at that same goal. The research group for the study was super small and it gave me a lot more questions than answers and frankly we don’t have enough research to say for sure. But I do have to say, this article gave me lots of interesting research questions today. :)
When my marriage ended, I definitely began to understand sex as another tool in my self-care toolkit: one way to practice embodiment, one way to move from thinking to feeling, one way to practice being in the moment. The transcendent experiences when they came, then, didn't really surprise me as much as they felt integrated with all the other somatic practices I had at that time - breathwork, movement, humming, etc. I'm not a big drug person (like, hardly any, ever) so I can't really compare it to that. For me, it has to do with interconnectedness, with the sensation that I am boundless--I don't exist in THIS body and you don't exist in THAT body but instead we're energetically and spiritually connected, operating in a bigger field. So I really relate to what Joe is saying - it's not that I leave my body, exactly, it's that I understand that my body is infinite, and so is everyone else's. Thanks, as always, for writing!
Thank you guys for sharing this! It was lovely to read. Abigail, do you enjoy fantasy novels? If you do, I would love to send you one or two of my books, I think you would really enjoy them. We share some similar ideas of spirituality which are reflected in my novels. And if Joe likes urban fantasy (which I kind of doubt), he might really enjoy my novels about the FBI’s first undead special agent — Agent Rusty Bones.
How nerdy are you? Because there is some science behind why you and your husband experience euphoria during orgasm differently, and why, specifically, he notices his most in a BJ.
I want to hear the nerdy stuff! Please 🙏
Okay, so if I’m getting the vibes right: you both are experiencing a euphoria in orgasm sometimes. But one part in particular struck me was how Joe described orgasm in a bj versus in penetration, whereas you’re not limited to a certain kind. I’m wondering if different parts of your brain are lighting up to make you both orgasm and it’s actually giving you slightly different responses. So during sex, notably in periorgasm, men have more activity in parts of the brain associated with information coordination, pain suppression, visual input, timing, and prediction of physical consequences of an action. Whereas women have activation in systems which deal with knowing where our limbs are in space, sensory processing, touch interpretation, and movement. Now these changes in peri-orgasm pretty much lead to an identical ending, orgasm, and that releases almost identical chemicals and shows up pretty much the same way. But, what that shows us is that there is more than one way for the human brain to end up in that happy place of orgasm, and that it might be different slightly for the sexes or at least for different people. It doesn’t dictate quality of an orgasm, but it does show that it’s not just “oh I like missionary and you like doggystyle” differences in how people might get to orgasm, but literally our brains might be going different ways to end up at that same goal. The research group for the study was super small and it gave me a lot more questions than answers and frankly we don’t have enough research to say for sure. But I do have to say, this article gave me lots of interesting research questions today. :)
When my marriage ended, I definitely began to understand sex as another tool in my self-care toolkit: one way to practice embodiment, one way to move from thinking to feeling, one way to practice being in the moment. The transcendent experiences when they came, then, didn't really surprise me as much as they felt integrated with all the other somatic practices I had at that time - breathwork, movement, humming, etc. I'm not a big drug person (like, hardly any, ever) so I can't really compare it to that. For me, it has to do with interconnectedness, with the sensation that I am boundless--I don't exist in THIS body and you don't exist in THAT body but instead we're energetically and spiritually connected, operating in a bigger field. So I really relate to what Joe is saying - it's not that I leave my body, exactly, it's that I understand that my body is infinite, and so is everyone else's. Thanks, as always, for writing!
I love this pov! Thank you for sharing 💫
Thank you guys for sharing this! It was lovely to read. Abigail, do you enjoy fantasy novels? If you do, I would love to send you one or two of my books, I think you would really enjoy them. We share some similar ideas of spirituality which are reflected in my novels. And if Joe likes urban fantasy (which I kind of doubt), he might really enjoy my novels about the FBI’s first undead special agent — Agent Rusty Bones.
Douglas I’d love to read!!!
Shoot me an address by DM or email.
douglasspierce313 at the gmail.
I will get some signed copies in the mail.
As a rule I adore your writing, but this was a soporific.
lol Tom, I appreciate your rule-breaking much as I appreciate your rule